I was wrong.

There is something more then the predominate feelings of fear and Nothing.

There is Pain.

I have known pain in the physical and emotional sense before … God knows I have. But I had thought that the ability to feel true, deep emotional agony had been cut out, along with so much else of me.

Apparently not.

I used to wonder if there was anything besides the never ending fear, the never ending emptiness. I used to think that I would do anything to feel something else.

But is the pain really better? It is still so new and unfamiliar that I have yet to draw any strong conclusions.