I hadn’t recorded this previously, but upon my return to the island, I stumbled upon a sweet gent, whom I accidentally mistook for a lady. He was kind and offered food and good company. There was something about him that struck me. I felt that now after a year or so grieving over my deceased partner was now just old and in poor taste. I brazenly offered a date. I was pleased to discover it was accepted. Indulging in the first bath I had in a long time. I swore I wouldn’t overstep my bounds. I found myself drawn to him.
We spoke of many things.. I suppose mostly our experiences and survival. Granted not much more to really relate to these days. We exchanged a kiss .. which for me was a huge step. Though I must admit that it sparked life in me again. his name is Sweetie. I will hope to bump into him again and then we can go on that second date. *grins*
As for today….
Today was not unlike most, wake up from an unrestful slumber. Every small noise causing an alarm and upon rising feeling like a goon yourself. Though today I felt hope rise on the horizon. Returning to the hospital and seeing Ben there.. it was like coming home.
My resolve was that much more when I came across a female goon under the bridge. She was in such a sorry state, that she couldn’t pose a threat. Seeing her flesh hanging off her bones was one thing. What strikes me at the core, is when I see these goons walking with no identity. Their minds and souls vacant. It breaks my heart as I remember my husband who was found among them.
I hadn’t the heart to off her. Even if it would have been considered a mercy. Not there yet. So I walk back to finish this arduous day. Hopeful for so much more in the end. Or are we forever lost in this nightmare?