Dear Diary..

Found a poor defenseless rabbit alone in the woods with a walker today.. I didn’t even think about it as I rose my gun.. The trigger was pulled and he dropped.. like nothing .. then the rabbit unharmed was spooked.. Couldn’t let him get away either.. I grew up hunting with my father.. killing the rabbit had no effect.. we eat them… means those who eat at the shelter will have something to fill their bellies with.. But two years ago, never would of I of thought I would be killing anyone… I took a oath when I went into the Fire Academy.. I miss the smell of a fire station.. the sweet smoke lingers on each of us after every call.. spreading throughout the whole station… I guess, I should be lucky that I had ten years to enjoy my job while I did …  I need to find a group… someone who is brave enough to go to the mainland with me. Its better in numbers.. AES needs a fire truck… what would we do if something bad happened… what if a Generator blew up cause the whole building to catch on fire… would be a new thrill to put the fire out as soon as possible . not cause it will spread.. but cause death lingers even out of the flames.. the walkers would be attracted to it.. to get the fire out before anyone is harmed from them will be the new key to success.. but I need a truck… I’m starting to feel as if i can’t breath.. I need to feel useful again… While I’m helping in the hospital using a degree cause of my need to be a overachiever .. I miss the flames licking my skin .. the burning need to run into the burning building the rush that goes through your body…  instead.. I’m in the woods, Shooting a man who is rotting flesh for a rabbit… hunting food for my love ones .. for my group… for those who can’t… This is my life .. I’m taking a life.. but can it really be taking a life when hes already gone? .. He can’t think..  He can’t feel.. he only knows one thing… So I haven’t gone against my believes.. at-least I like to think so…